Tuesday, October 18, 2011

A Message to Marco Polo

Mr. Polo,

When I first received your letter, I confess to having been a little alarmed. The Hong Kong postage, the brown paper, the blood red ink, all these and more awoke in my fevered imagination visions of a mad Chinaman, obsessed with this humble online blog. Only later did I realize that such exquisitely insane penmanship (perfectly executed), intelligent (though slightly delirious) writing, and strange parchment all pointed to one author: yourself. For a brief moment I wondered if a talented family such as the Mahoneys might have written it as a clever feat of correspondence, but in the end, I knew that only you, yourself could have understood the powerful message encoded within my story. I am honored by your acknowledgement. Please accept my humble thanks for your painstaking efforts to reach me through such a fascinating and effective (though a little alarming) means.

I await your further instruction in the mysteries of the Light...

Your faithful servant,

Benjamin Wolaver


  1. Oh... this is getting interesting! Wonderfully, curiously, interesting!


  2. I was wondering when Marco would get around to writing that letter...

  3. The letter sent unto me, has been plainly read before the council.
    May your fear be abated my brother, my faith in you has been rewarded my friend.
    Whereby shall we know that you have understood our formula?
    This Mahoneys of whom you speak, are they your emissaries, and this Starch, the Captain of your armies in the Kingdom Of The Heavens?
    The Great Kahn of the Tartars studies the language of your people. He sends greeting in your tongue, Be Cool Man.
    Thy servants,
    The Men on this side of Time...and at Such a Time.

    Marco Polo

  4. At Such A Time... I am awed by your words, O Great Polo. You are misguided if you think that the Mahoneys are my emissaries. They are a family of noble hearts, but they dare not dream of such visions as have illuminated your own mind. Their innocent spirits have most likely never used such a dark saying as "Be Cool, Man"... we, however, know that to "Be" is to Exist... to Exist as "Cool" is to have divined the Essence of Awesomeness... and to have done these things and become Man, that is to be Human... this is the Bottom of The Cookie Jar.

    Oh, Great One, I send greetings to the great Khan and await further instruction in the one Way of Illumination and Power...

    We convey to you our desire for safe travels, and perhaps we shall meet again when we are both like golden clouds on the wind!
    I include final messages from the monks, and the Great Kublai Kahn.
    We leave when you see the Phoenix rise in the East, my friend and brother.
    Marco Polo, son of Nicolo

    From the Monks of Dadu, wise and learned, which handle the ancient texts:
    Ex Fide Fortis, my son.
    Pax vobiscum

    From Kublai Kahn, son of Toluy, Setsen Kahn the magnificent, Emperor Shengde shengong Wen wu, Ruler Zhiyuan in Borjigin.
    To Benjamin, son of Wolaver, whose habitation is in the Kingdom of the Heavens.
    I, Kublai Kahn, wish to speedily correct error as touching,...Be Cool Man. I, even I alone, wish to be declared awesome! Let it be diligently done! Be not afraid of the words you have heard, but fail not to do this. Perfect peace, and at such a time.